Hanky Code Patch
Designed by: Paul
Order Info: Advantage Emblem Q-0028
Associated Costs: $2 for patch, cost of bandana(s)
Plan It
Learn about the Hanky Code, it’s history, and how it was used. What colors do you flag? On what side?
The Hanky Code was used by gay men in leather bars to quickly advertise what kind of play they were into. A handkerchief in the back pocket indicates, by color and position, what a guy's interested in for the night - specifically right then, which is key. Left pocket for tops, right pocket for bottoms. For instance, a man wearing a light blue flag in his left pocket wants someone to give him a blow-job. A man wearing a gray hanky in his right pocket is hoping to get tied up. A hanky tied around the neck indicates top or bottom interest, or he could wear one on each side.
For a while, I've been interested in flagging. Because I'm gay, and I do leather, and I go to the kink club, but I don't participate in most aspects of BDSM, that raised the question of what I do participate in. Which eventually led me to flagging. There are options in BDSM that aren't 'hit people' and 'have sex'. For me, personally, I flag light blue on the right - I am willing to give blow-jobs.
After I started thinking a lot about flagging, and even doing so on the rare occasions I'm out at the club, M started thinking more about it - here's the writing she made about it - https://fetlife.com/users/120724/posts/5356255. There are several sites linked at the bottom of that which were used for reference. The big girls flag several colors I don't, which is an awesome thing about flags. If we switch alters, we can add or remove flags easily.
Do It
Get at least one bandana, and wear it out to at least one kink-friendly event as a flag. Journal about how you felt about this. Did anyone notice and comment on your hanky? Did you draw it to anyone’s attention?
I do wear a light blue hanky when I'm out, especially if I'm feeling brave and hoping maybe someone will approach me. It makes me really nervous and embarrasses me to feel like I'm 'cruising' - which also is one of my kinks, so just wearing it gives me lots of feelings. It's been noticed a couple of times, but nobody's ever taken me up on it. There's one person at the club that M's talked about flagging with, and he notices and comments. Mercury, of course, notices and comments, too, but in 'host mode', not like he's ever gonna take someone up on it.
Share It
Share your journalled answers with a friend or with the troop, either in person or online. Will you be flagging again? Do you have any thoughts you’d like to share about flagging?
M's taken action on this, deciding to make some special-to-us flags that can be clipped onto clothes - especially our kilt - instead of tucked into pockets, since we often don't have pockets. She's bought a bunch of hankies in colors that one or another of us flag and made them into little clip-on things that we can add and remove based on who's out and their mood. I'll definitely wear one when I'm out. They also got me, for Christmas, a keychain with a teddy-bear on it that can be clipped, as well. Because I do like the bears...
I'd really like to see flagging come back into style at the club - it would be cool to see what people are advertising. And in the last couple of years there's so many people in and out that don't know each other, I think it would really help generate some play for those that want to do it. It's neat to look at, and it's an easy conversation-starter.
Here's the flags M's made for this, that various of us might wear at some point:
Houndstooth - biting (left, right, and a neckscarf for both)
Dark Gray - bondage (left & right)
Light Blue - blow-jobs (left & right)
Black - impact play (left & right)
Fuschia - spanking (left & right)
Red - fisting (right)
Dark Blue - sex (right)
Dark Pink - boob torture (right)
Teddy Bear - bears/cuddling (right)
Here's the flags M's made for this, that various of us might wear at some point:
Houndstooth - biting (left, right, and a neckscarf for both)
Dark Gray - bondage (left & right)
Light Blue - blow-jobs (left & right)
Black - impact play (left & right)
Fuschia - spanking (left & right)
Red - fisting (right)
Dark Blue - sex (right)
Dark Pink - boob torture (right)
Teddy Bear - bears/cuddling (right)
